A visit back in time

In February we returned to the States for a short visit. My dad (Miro’s grandpa) surprised us with 2 airline tickets and an invitation to his 70th Birthday party. Before we agreed to return, I asked my dad if we didn’t go, would that prevent him from turning 70. He said it would not, so we were so excited to be there for his milestone.

It was beyond amazing seeing my family, many of whom we haven’t seen for close to three years or longer. Our two week visit was spectacular in terms of reconnecting with friends and family once again….

Here’s some pics of the amazing people we connected and reconnected with:

But ‘home’….

So, what does it feel like to visit your home country after almost 3 years out of the country?

I can tell you what I expected to feel: nostalgia, filled with memories, emotionally connected, the feeling of ‘coming home’.

But I did not experience any of those things.. I expected some sort of emotional response.. but really, my experience contained a bit of stress.

We’ve been living stress free for almost 3 years. I can feel the difference throughout my entire body. Being in the states and specifically in Los Angeles felt so different, than our current lifestyle. Perhaps what I was feeling was residue through legacy emotions or perhaps it was the current demands of the city. Either way, there were some distinct differences we experienced in our trip back to Southern California as opposed to our current lifestyle.

In Los Angeles, I dealt with the stress of driving, the stress of traffic and the stress of scheduling time. These are all things that on a larger scope, I have removed from our lives. Now, we sleep when we want to, eat when we want to, take our time in one place, live weeks without any preplanning. I don’t drive anymore, deal with traffic, have a tie to schedules or need to make deadlines…

The difference between being in the moment and being on a schedule was huge for me.

And there was consumerism.

Consumerism.

Oh yeah,  the culture of buying.

Oh yeah, it was there. It’s here too. Consumerism is live and well in every country we visit, but it seems cartoon-like as an observation. The questions of what we live, what we live without prompts us to observe our own actions..

But friends and family made our trip.

Home.

What is Home?

Home is a place in the mind. When it is empty, it frets. It is fretful with memory, faces and places and times gone by. Beloved images rise up in disobedience and make a mirror for emptiness.

MAEVE BRENNAN, The Visitor

The people made the trip. The place did not.

Would we do it again? Sure, but give me another 2 ½ years before you ask that question again.. You’ll always be a part of our experience, United States of America, just don’t need to be there to know that.