The Homecoming & Coming Home- What is it?

The Homecoming & Coming Home- What is it?
May 15, 2012 Lainie Liberti

A visit back in time

In February we returned to the States for a short visit. My dad (Miro’s grandpa) surprised us with 2 airline tickets and an invitation to his 70th Birthday party. Before we agreed to return, I asked my dad if we didn’t go, would that prevent him from turning 70. He said it would not, so we were so excited to be there for his milestone.


It was beyond amazing seeing my family, many of whom we haven’t seen for close to three years or longer. Our two week visit was spectacular in terms of reconnecting with friends and family once again….

Here’s some pics of the amazing people we connected and reconnected with:


But ‘home’….

So, what does it feel like to visit your home country after almost 3 years out of the country?

I can tell you what I expected to feel: nostalgia, filled with memories, emotionally connected, the feeling of ‘coming home’.

But I did not experience any of those things.. I expected some sort of emotional response.. but really, my experience contained a bit of stress.

We’ve been living stress free for almost 3 years. I can feel the difference throughout my entire body. Being in the states and specifically in Los Angeles felt so different, than our current lifestyle. Perhaps what I was feeling was residue through legacy emotions or perhaps it was the current demands of the city. Either way, there were some distinct differences we experienced in our trip back to Southern California as opposed to our current lifestyle.

In Los Angeles, I dealt with the stress of driving, the stress of traffic and the stress of scheduling time. These are all things that on a larger scope, I have removed from our lives. Now, we sleep when we want to, eat when we want to, take our time in one place, live weeks without any preplanning. I don’t drive anymore, deal with traffic, have a tie to schedules or need to make deadlines…

The difference between being in the moment and being on a schedule was huge for me.

And there was consumerism.


Oh yeah,  the culture of buying.

Oh yeah, it was there. It’s here too. Consumerism is live and well in every country we visit, but it seems cartoon-like as an observation. The questions of what we live, what we live without prompts us to observe our own actions..

But friends and family made our trip.


What is Home?

Home is a place in the mind. When it is empty, it frets. It is fretful with memory, faces and places and times gone by. Beloved images rise up in disobedience and make a mirror for emptiness.


The people made the trip. The place did not.

Would we do it again? Sure, but give me another 2 ½ years before you ask that question again.. You’ll always be a part of our experience, United States of America, just don’t need to be there to know that.



  1. Robin 12 years ago

    We loved having you home! We all live through you! I’m so happy you have peace that so many will never find! I love you my dear friend of 40+ years!

    • Author
      ilainie 12 years ago

      Loved being there to see you too!

  2. Carla 12 years ago

    Great post, I feel similarly when we arrive home from a month away. It must be amazing to see it all through eyes after 3 years away. Wow.
    We are still in the getting ready phase, but I just cannot wait to eliminate those same stresses from our lives.

    • Author
      ilainie 12 years ago

      Grrr.. to stresses! Good luck with your planning! 

  3. Jeremy Branham 12 years ago

    Thank you so much for this!  It’s so refreshing to read how you viewed America after coming back.  Stress, schedules, and consumerism sum it up perfectly.  Glad you had a great time with the family but I hope people can see things in this country through your eyes on a return visit.

    Living in the US isn’t bad but we don’t have the best way of life by any means.  That’s why I love traveling – learning from other cultures and people.

    • Author
      ilainie 12 years ago

      Yes Jeremy, different perspectives. I never try to say our point of view is better than anyone else’s. I only try to be present with my feelings as they come up.  I admit, I had an amazing time with our friends and family, that’s what made our trip. 

  4. 'Tis Moi 12 years ago

    My children & I moved to Australia in 2007 (post divorce). It was the best move of my life. I’d like to do some traveling with my kids but the oldest just started uni here & my 13 year old daughter would love it- but my ex would have a fit (a court-type one). So, will make do in traveling as best we can until she’s old enough to make up her own mind what she wants…You’re an inspiration- you too, Miro!  🙂
    PS: I have no desire to ever return to the US. In fact, we just became AU citizens this AU Day!

    • Author
      ilainie 12 years ago

      Congrats! How awesome! I’m constantly in awe of how many wonderful people are feeling the same way. What a wonderful community! 

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